Raising, Healing, Encouraging

I would give anything to have Aidan here with me.

Since I can't, I cherish the people and the moments that allow me to share him. Today I was recognized as "Aidan's Mom."

AMAZING

Who knew that something so simple could soothe an aching heart?

Life is pretty hectic these days. Between work, marriage, family, friends, March of Dimes, Holy Sews and my newest venture Still Standing, I can't tell you what is going on from one moment to the next. I can however, tell you that in the past week I have shared more of Aidan than I have in the past six months. People have done more than just listen. They have asked. They want to know him. Today, we passed around pictures and fell in love with these sweet babies all over again.

With March of Dimes, we are raising awareness. We are changing the future.

With Holy Sews, we are healing. We are coming together and finding ways to give their lives a purpose.

With Standing Still, I am finding the courage to encourage others. To stand up and be the example so many others have been to me. I am the "survivor."

All three groups are so different. All three are so special. All three are allowing me the opportunity to grieve. Openly, freely, without reservation. I am learning to tread water. I am learning to just go with the waves. I won't drown and eventually I will find my footing again.

I can feel the sand between my toes. I can hear the steady rhythm of the waves. I can taste the salt.

My heart is broken, but beating. 

Answered prayers through an email

Tomorrow is five months. The last two weeks of them have been almost as rough as the first two. Seriously.

It was taking everything I had to get up and go to work. Let alone be a good friend, sister, daughter, wife or mother. I just wanted Aidan back. I wanted to be a mom that is easily recognizable because my child is in my arms. I just want others to know him and be in awe of his milestones.

Today, I found out that even though Aidan isn't in my arms, he is still reaching milestones. Totally different ones than the other babies around me, but still.

I received this while at work today. I was able to share our story further.

I found what life has been beating out of me lately. Aidan's purpose.

I needed a sign this big. This public. This picture.

Answered prayers are not on our time. They are on God's. Thankfully, he is putting this one out for the world to see.