The question that has no answer. I could search everyday, all day and never find an answer that would justify my loss.
Instead, I do. I get out of bed everyday. I spread our story. I do at least one thing that makes me smile, I put one foot in front of another, I talk about Aidan with someone. Each day I spend trying to find and serve God's purpose.
And then others ask "Why?"
Because I have to. I was given the gift of being Aidan's mom. When I found out I was pregnant with Aidan everything changed. When Aidan was born everything changed again. When his nurse first handed him to me and I first laid eyes on my son I knew that everything I had been doing in my life had led to that moment. I am meant to be Aidan's mom.
Aidan's life was brief. His impact is not. He has changed a lot of things for a lot of people, forever. I don't think I can say that about my own life. And that is why.
I am now living for Aidan because he can't.
I have created a page on facebook "On Aidan's Wings."
I've created it, in hopes that our story will inspire others to share their stories. That this will be yet another gateway to awareness and openess.
Each day I take a step. This is todays. Please spread it around.
Look for the Light
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I grew up on the central coast of California, a place full of natural
beauty. We had the Pacific and wine country and hills that wove throughout
the county...
1 hour ago
We lost our second child 13 years ago on September3, 1998. He too was a little boy. I was not as courageous as you are about talking out loud about it, but I am making progress. Christopher is just as real to us as Aiden is to you, and every night I tell good night before falling asleep. He helped see me through our third pregnancy and to our healthy second boy. I like to think of him as sharing that pregnancy with me as my guardian angel.
ReplyDeleteI want to applaud you for taking this brave step. It's a scary step, I'm sure, but one that needs to be taken. Thank you. --Katie
Hi! A friend told me about your blog. I wanted to share a few ladies blogs with you who have experienced infant loss first hand. www.angiesmithonline.com I suggest you go back and read Angie's posts right after she lost Audrey. I hope they will be an encouragement to you. She also wrote a book on infant loss, "I Will Carry You." I highly recommend it! Also, therowefam.blogspot.com is another awesome blog. Katie is wonderful and I hope she would be an encouragement to you. http://mcginleybabyjourney.blogspot.com/ is another awesome one! I hope it helps to read that you are not alone!
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